 by Rob and David Chesnick  hile pondering the existence or nonexistence of the universe, the unending usefulness of
cool-whip, and the amount of golf balls it takes to fill an Olympic-sized
swimming pool, we decided to create a script for the newest talk show
episode (since we all know that they are all rigged). This episode is
for the SOCKO SHOW!!!
Socko: I have my own talk show? Talk shows are rigged? Since when?
I know that the unicycling clown transvestite with hemorrhoids I saw
on TV yesterday was definitely real. I believe it. You should
believe it; if you don't, you definitely have problems.
Well, anyway, Socko, this is about your favorite item of the clothing family. Socks! 
Socko (host): Welcome to the Socko Show. Today's subject: Big Socks
and little feet. Our guests Vladimir and his wife Elmira. Please
welcome them to the show!
**applause** Socko: Well Elmira, what seems to be the problem? Elmira: **crying** Well, Vladimir and I have been married for twenty-four years and every year for some strange reason, Vladimir's socks seem to grow larger and larger. They look like they belong to a hippo; fat, huge, dirty socks! His socks are so big you cant even see his shoes when he wears them! I am thinking about leaving him because of this. Socko: Well Vladimir, what do you have to say about this? Vladimir: It's not my fault. Ask anyone here (removing sock [placing it on floor] showing tiny, warty, hairy feet)... are my feet that big? Are they? Elmira: Well, no. That's why we are here, you bumbling idiot. Vladimir: Well if you just got a job and didn't spend all my money on women's underwear, I could actually buy socks that fit and we could actually move out of the trailer park into a real home. 
Elmira: Socko, I'm not the one who wears the underwear (pointing a
finger at Vladimir)
**takes out lighter and lights Vladimir's sock on fire** Socko: (putting fire out with a fire extinguisher) That's all we have time for today. Join us next time for Dogs: psychic, claustrophobic, and schizophrenic. |
