"Mr. Molg" by Evan Hohlfeld

Mr. Molg
by Evan Hohlfeld
Evan composed this story one day in 1993 on his napkin at lunchtime in Wissahickon Middle School.

Book 1

         One day Mr. Molg woke up with a start that started his day, also. This was accompanied by a strange feeling. This feeling sent him reeling. It is similar to that feeling you get when you finally, truly understand that today is the first day of the rest of your life. But of course, if given a second guess, he would have said it was a hangover.

         After starting his day with the usual things, putting his shirt, pants, sox, shoes and toupee, and getting his cup of coffee. Unfortunately, he put his shoes on the wrong feet, the Left on the left and the Right on the right, normally, he puts the Right on the left and the Left on his right, though when he danced he wore two left shoes. Throughout his day, his feet hurt, so he decided that his feet must be on wrong since his shoes can’t be on wrong and that he'd better get his feet changed.

         Now Mr. Molg was a certified professional Pipe Cleaner. No, that's not a plumber. Plumbing is a different thing entirely. He then left jubilantly off for work because today was Fruity Nutcake day, and Mr. Molg hoped to earn the title of Fruity Nutcake.

         At work, Mr. Molg ran into his lord-high boss person, so he said "hello lord-high Boss person, I like your sox." Just after Mr. Molg passed away, a secondary came in and said, "Hello lord-high Boss person, I like your sox." Later that day, Mr. Molg was entitled Fruity Nutcake and he was happy.

         Unfortunately, because of Mr. Molg's shoes, his feet hurt extremely badly, he tripped and fell into a new road. The road was being maid a steam roller came over to roll steam onto the asphault and onto Mr. Molg. Mr. Molg went home a shriveled pancake of Fruity Nutcake awkwardly.

Evan Hohlfeld is a silly old chap, and a silly old chap is he. He almost went to Harvard, but then Chelsea worked her charms on him, and now he's a Stanford boy, proud and true. Watch out for Evan! He'll eat your green Dots if you let him!

What I Did Yesterday

They're Crocodiles, Dammit!