"You're toast!" I screamed at the two pieces of bread I wanted
-- no, needed -- for the most crucial ingredient in the Ultimate Dagwood
Sandwich of all-time, an even larger and more delectable creation than
the gargantuan sandwich from the Dagwood Mafia Fiasco -- only this
time
with the magic ingredient (previously undiscovered for all-Dagwood
History) -- Kosher Lima Beans -- the most scrumptious addition ever
conceived, which I had divined in a dream while I slept on a heap of
enchanted kitchen condiments on that clandestine hill of New Jersey
(whose name is unutterable), those fantastically savory lima beans,
those two last friggin' pieces of white bread, that I certainly wasn't
going to let
elude me just so they could meet up with those two
despicable slices of pumpernickel. I yanked fistfuls of hair out of my
head and my moans echoed up and down the hall as I crumpled onto
the floor, recalling the agonizing defeat of that last insufferable debacle.
Don't dare think I've forgotten what travesty transpired last time --
oh, no -- I certainly wasn't going to let that happen again. I had every
intention to stop them from getting away, even if it meant my life.
So I pulled them out of the bag and popped them into the toaster.
Just like I said before.
Toast.
Sean McBride
had a revelation the other day. The letters in the word 'sane' can be rearranged to
spell the word 'Sean.' So in other words, Sean is in sane. This
miraculously re-proves something we've all known for years.
