Dear Mister Editor Sir:
What is the answer to this question?
--Tony Lastowka
Dear Tony,
Your mom.
Dear mr. Ed,
How come there are only two letters here, and both of them are stupid?
-Professor Bug
Dear Professor:
That is an excellent question, Professor. Some might say that it is simply because people are content with the Swing Machine, and that people who are content have nothing to say. Others might say that they are all lazy bastards who deserve to die. Still others say -- myself included -- that it is due to a lack of enthusiasm about the Dear Mister Editor Sir section, which can be quickly remedied with a strong dose of controversy. Controversy is a very special thing. It is what happens when someone says the word "gay homosexual" out loud, which I just did. Nevermind that it is more than one word or that it is redundant; it's controversial, and you should be mad at me for saying it. Thank you.
